What God sees when he sees me:
God sees all of my next thoughts, next mistakes, next hopes, next decisions, next relationships, next commitments, next desires—and my final breath. At this moment, God sees me living with him in his spiritual realm forever.
He sees all my immediate thoughts and why I am thinking this. He sees my deep love for family, my need for him, my impatient ambitions. He sees my psychological, physical and spiritual upheavals. He knows my “frame” and what makes me who I am.
God knows the full context of my past: God knows my heredity (what is in my DNA to make me who I am). He sees my ancestry (the faces of family members in my DNA). God knows me as an adult, a young adult, a teen, a child, a toddler, an infant, a fetus, my parents’ thoughts (whether I was planned or unplanned)—he knows my grandparents and how they affected me by their decisions, beliefs, mistakes.
In fact, God knows my connection to my ancestors as they passed myriad historical mileposts: the Civil War, the Revolutionary War, and far beyond that to the Renaissance and Middle Ages. He knew who I would become today, and made a place in history for me, long before there was a Roman Empire, and Greek and Persian or Chinese cultures and dynasties. Before the Babylonians and Assyrians. He knew me before Noah and Abraham and even before Adam and Eve. He designed me to be me.
So when God looks at this man, sitting here writing, he sees ALL of me: Past, present, and future. Nothing is hidden! Nothing is unanswered. God is not limited to seeing the present alone—like I am.
Now for the kicker:
God also sees (at this same moment that he sees me writing this) all the faces and relationships I have made, am making, and will make in the future. And each of these relationships are intimately connected to me. He knows them in the context of their past, present and future, AND how we relate to each other.
Sometimes I get exasperated at God for not preventing something hurtful in my life, but in God’s timeless, cosmic wisdom, how does this pain (or healing of it, or forgiving the perpetrator of it) synchronize the whole of my life?
And I’m back to where I live again—the present—trusting God. Knowing that there is only one reason that I exist. To serve the one who decided that I should live at all.